New Idea

I am trying to go home today as opposed to on Wednesday. The quitting smoking is hitting me hard today and it is nasty and rainy and dreary outside and I don't have crap to do and I am going a little crazy. Trying to see if I can get people to cover my meetings for tomorrow, Monday, and Tuesday. Will update.

Victory

So I drove in my car for many many hours today and managed not to smoke a cigarette so that is good. I am drinking some wine now so that will be another test. I don't really even want a cigarette anymore so I am good.

I am going home to visit in less than a week! I am so excited to see my family and friends and be around people. It shall be great.

Day four and the test

So it is day 4 of no smoking and I am still doing pretty well. Except last night and today I feel like I could cry at the drop of a hat and that is not real cool. It is directly related to the smoking because nothing else is going on in my life that I really would cry about.

Today will be a rough one. I have my meeting that is an hour and a half drive from here. I haven't had to drive that far without a cigarette yet. And I really hate driving which doesn't help the whole situation.

In other news, my mom got married yesterday. So now I have a step daddy. Kind of strange but happy for them :)

Level of Importance

It is always so strange how wrong I am. Like I can't read people for shit. I think I am important to someone and then they don't call or get in touch with me and I realize that I am not. Whoops. Wish I wsn't wrong all the time.

Stressing

So I really really really want a cigarette right now. And that really sucks. I am just trying to hold it all together and not give in. We shall see how that works. I tried to take a nap today and couldn't even sleep through that so I am hoping I can sleep tonight. I am getting really cranky since I can't sleep lately. It annoys the crap out of me. I don't know how long that will last for.

Day 3

Just woke up recently and don't even want a cigarette. Of course I barely slept last night. I think it is some strange reaction to the lack of nicotenne so now I can't sleep. I am feeling pretty good today though. A small headache. Off to the gym and then back for a nap since I didn't really get to sleep last night.

Almost 48 hours

It is hard right now. I really really want a cigarette. I have to keep reminding myself why I am doing this. For health, to be a good example, so other people don't think I am gross, money saving, etc etc. It is hard though. How long will these feelings last? The hardest part is when I go home and we go out drinking. That will be a real rough time. AHHH. Hopefully I will sleep tonight and tomorrow will be easier.