Losing part of myself

So I have discovered that whenever I start talking to a guy or start dating someone I kind of lose focus of what I need to be doing for myself. I really start putting my priorities on the back burner while I wait around for something to happen with the guy. That's got to be the dumbest thing ever and I need to break that habit big time.

I think I am frustrated with the whole online dating thing and just dating in general. Maybe at this time, I am just not meant to date anyone. I think I need to work on myself. I let people get the best of me sometime and let it affect (effect?) me until I feel just completely drained. I think I just need to figure out myself. Who knows whats going to go on with me. I hope someone awesome comes along eventually, I just really don't feel like its going to happen right now until I make myself better.

Dating Rules

So I have been trying out the whole online dating thing and am thinking it doesnt really work either. I think all those people on the eharmony commercials are liars or actors. But acting is really lying ifyou think about it (not an original thought its from a movie or something.) Anyway ... I thought of some rules for dating ... or maybe more specifically dating me. LOL!

1. If you say you are going to call, then call dammit.

2. If we have plans, don't break them.

3. Answer your phone.

4. If you only want to talk on your terms, then you probably aren't for me.

5. Must have a degree.

6. Many more I am sure just can't think.

So I am done dating I think for at least the foreseeable future. Oh well.

Tuesday

So it's Tuesday and I haven't been to the gym since LAST wednesday. That's a long time for me. Hopefully my head will clear up (I can feel the pressure) so I can go in the morning but who knows.

Psycho is getting worse. Its just like I don't think we would even be good friends because we have nothing in common but he thinks we have EVERYTHING in common but he really has no idea who I am. I am getting sick of his shit but am kinda scared he is going to do something crazy because I was really bruttally honest today and laid everything on the line and told him I didn't think we should be friends (for the 7000 time) but who knows. Always the crazies.

On a less crazy note, hopefully, I have a date on Saturday with a guy who is 24 and a chef. He called today and seems really cool. Hopefully it will be fun! We shall see.

Cold Monday

So I live in sunny Florida right? Not suppose to be cold. Well today it didn't get about 57 degrees and tonight it is suppose to get in the 20s. WHAT THE HELL? I thought Florida was always sunny and great. It is messing with my sicknesses as well. I get a little better and then all of a sudden my head feels like it is going to explode because the pressure keeps changing. It sucks.

What else sucks about it being cold? Well my grade level is the only grade level that sits outside from 7:30 - 8 before we take them into the classroom. Well obviously I don't want my kids to freeze but then we have to take them in as soon as they get there. We are the only grade that has to do this because the rest of the grades are inside. Can't we figure out another place to put them??? It just kind of messes up my whole morning routine which leaves me feeling out of whack for a couple of hours until my planning and I can regroup.

Tomorrow I am going to try to get up early and go and workout. I am not feeling perfect but I feel that if I don't get in the gym it is going to break my great cycle that I had going. Since I have been sick I haven't worked out since Wednesday.

On the dating side of things, I have been talking to a guy that seems really cool and hopefully it will work out. I don't want to jinx it though!

Getting up at 5am and dating

For the last three days I have been getting up at 5 and going to the gym. It has been good and has given me a lot of energy through the day though by 8:15pm I am asleep. But I do like working out in the mornings better because then I know that I have already got them in for the day and don't have to plan around them in the evenings.

So the guy I was dating just stopped contacting me today. He used to email me at work yadda yadda. So I guess thats over. That is what I wanted but now it feels weird to have no one to talk to and "hang" with. Oh well!